Friday, June 09, 2006

Too good to not share

First, did you know that June is National Accordion Awareness Month? It's true! Not "appreciation," but "awareness." As in AIDS awareness and breast cancer awareness? Be aware of accordions, people; they are lurking everywhere. Some guidelines if you should come into contact with an accordion:
  • do not attempt to poke, touch, or squeeze the accordion unless you have had proper training and certification, and are equipped with laytex gloves.
  • avoid street fairs and festivals where accordions are commonly found
  • if an accordion should make an agressive moves toward you, don't provoke it; keep your eyes lowered and back away slowly. Do not attempt to "play dead," as accordions are very wiley have been known to see through this ploy.

Next up, only in Florida (we hope): a judge ordered two lawyers to use a game of "Rock Paper Scissors" to settle a legal dispute. Best line of the article:

"The USA Rock Paper Scissors League... offered to send representatives to referee the confrontation. 'We will make sure that rock, paper scissors is not made a mockery of by the legal system.'"

I couldn't make this shit up if I tried.


First Nations said...

1. accordians have been stalking me all my life. everywhere i go, there is an accordian. one becomes accustome-whats that sound???!?
2.the schmuggleware is truly circular. i think i see a small moon orbiting his southern hemisphere!
3. blogger sucks red, shiny ASS. 'down for maintenance' my ass. stupid free blogger.
4. cocks indeed. commie.

Billy said...

To win at scissors paper stone is easy. Just assume the other person will pick stone (the strong option) and go for paper. Thus you win.

hendrix said...

1. F tells me that he was forced to leave France in the first place because of accordions so I think that Accordion awareness week is a very good idea.

2. Billy, that wouldn't work if you were playing against me - I automatically choose scissors on the presumption that even if I lose I can stab the winner and thus be the only one left standing.

Sal said...

oh i LOVE the second one especially