Monday, November 05, 2007

I'm dying

Seriously.

I can't breathe, my sinuses are full of yellow-brown goop, I've got a splitting headache, my ears are plugged, I'm coughing my lungs up, sneezing my brains out, and I ache all over.

Fucking flu.

(And before you even suggest it, Herebe, it's NOT from over-training.)

Now the only question remains, What do I want on my tombstone? Ham, mushroom, and pineapple, of course!

16 comments:

Frobisher said...

The trick is not to give in to these things - keep yourself busy and working (housework, cooking, ironing, etc.) and you'll soon forget about your sniffles.

I find I'm far too busy to get ill.

Timorous Beastie said...

How about Spike Milligan's classic tombstone epithet, "I told you I was ill"?

Chaucer's Bitch said...

frobs: yeah, i'm sure the reason you're never ill is all the hoovering you do. or should i say "sucking?"

TB: i was thinking more along the lines of "I can now tell you conclusively that there is no god." hehehe.

S. Vincent said...

no such thing as over-training, only under-eating and under-resting.

S. Vincent said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
オウム said...

Hope you're feeling better soon.

Perhaps do a few days just stretching and not training hard...

Did Pirate give it to you (or vice versa)?

Rimshot said...

VOCATUS ATQUE
NON VOCATUS
DEUS ADERIT
~ Carl Jung


Gesundheit. Here's hoping you get better quickly.

FirstNations said...

honestly. what do i want on my tombstone? did you really say that?


omg *snif* i am so proud!


betcha its plague. you picked it up down in the crypt. some kind of medieval plague virus. yup.

Shay said...

awww sounds like you need to take a break from training and focus on getting better!
One or two good days of rest and I'm sure you'll start feeling better.

Tim Footman said...

Yellow-brown goop?

Only when it's liberally streaked with blood will you know the depths of sinus hell.

(Waits for someone to pitch in, Four-Yorkshireman-style, saying: "Blood? Bloody blood? When I 'ad sinus trouble I were sneezing out gobbets of me own brain tissue" etc, etc...)

Dave said...

'sneezing out gobbets of me own brain tissue'? We didn't have time for such luxuries down t'pit. Stick a ferret up each nostril and stop whining.

Miss Melville said...

I've recently contracted the plague as well. Coughing wrecks me, my nose is running like a faucet, and my eyes may actually burn out of my head. It's an awesome time.

Despite local wisdom, drowning it in whiskey doesn't seem to be helping. Deeply unfortunate. Is it possible to register at the doctor's while ill? I think I'm going to have to try...

Best of luck, I'll think about sending some flowers to go next to the tombstone, but let's face it-- I'm broke. ;)

hendrix said...

Whiskey does cure colds but you have to drink a lot of it.

Hope you feel better soon CB...

Timorous Beastie said...

Sorry, I did mean to add, "get well soon". Like your epithet, though.

Chaucer's Bitch said...

S.V: i assure you, under-eating is NOT my problem. :o)

???: yeah, Pirate gave it to me alright...
oh, wait, you mean the FLU. No, i managed to come up with that one on my own. Pirate seems uninfected thus far.

Rimmy: Danka.

FN: ooh, plague! at least that would be interesting, but no big purple protuberances in my armpits just yet. mostly a lot of coughing.

shay: hi-ya, newcomer! welcome to ME. sadly, it's going to take more than a couple days to get over this one, but like all good things, this too shall pass. eventually. blerugh.

TF: blood? yikes. i'm not that bad. yet. i understand The Plague come accessorized with bleeding from various orifices, though. i'll let you know when that kicks in.

Dave: i read your comment hearing the voice of Alan Rickman in my head, and it utterly cracked me up. Thanks!

Herman's slut: Oh, no! you too? it's not that whiskey is ineffective, it's that you just have use more. keep it up hon, i know you can do it!

HC: cheers, big ears.

TB: (now there's a moniker for a sickie!) it went without saying. ta, though. :o)

oread the SSA said...

"ham, mushroom, and pineapple..." GOOD LORD. No wonder you and Ma get along so well, holeeee jeebus, even when you're sick with the punning in here! Nicely played. Also, you can really play out a phlegmy flu for all it's worth. I milk those, totally - the whole sniffling and snot snorkling bit goes on for weeks! ...or at least until people avoid handing me extra work coz they're scared of my tenacious plague.